I know you’re trying to be nice, but it’s okay to bite everyone’s heads off. Eat all the chocolate chip cookies you can get your hands on, with milk, don’t work-out, get in bed and lock the damn door so nobody can bother you!

Feeling bloated and fat? So the hell what! Dare someone to say something about it while you’re in this mood! People think you’re being bitchy? Give them a reason and then demand they slide more cookies under the door. If they really love you, they’ll lace your cookies with Midol and crush a Vicodin in your Vodka for dinner that THEY better be cooking for you! And if they don’t, kick their asses out… stupid screwballs!

Try to get a good night’s sleep now y’all!
Enjoy Barrelassers 🙂

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